So John and I finally booked our wedding in Jamaica. February 2012… I’m excited.
The picture on my left is the last night John and I spent in Jamaica on the vacation he proposed. This picture was taken about 5 hours before I woke up in perhaps the worst muscle spasm I’ve had in my life. And let me tell you, I’ve had some doozies…
In grad school, while shopping at Ross, I reached up for a tea cup and literally thought someone had stabbed me in my ribs. I had pulled a muscle in my side that wrapped around my lungs and it proceeded to inhibit my breathing and consequently made a trip to New York later in the week extremely difficult.
But I digress. Back to the picture. I love this picture. Not only because John looks especially cute in light blue, or because of the fabulous light up tree that sat in the center of the indoor bar, but because we are so happy. That vacation was really great. Every morning we ate breakfast in a restaurant that had a roof but no walls. John proposed on our anniversary in a beach cabana. Those are the things I remember when I think about our vacation in Jamaica.
The only time I think about waking up in the middle of the night in muscle spasm is when I think about getting married in Jamaica. I’m afraid of waking up the morning of my wedding in spasm. In Jamaica. Without my arsenal. When I wake up in muscle spasm here I have a lot of options: my massage chair, my chiropractor, my massage therapist… Lots and lots of options. In Jamaica, I have a heating pad and advil.
I’m not gonna lie, it’s definitely created some anxiety for me which of course makes Fibro worse, blah blah blah… I’m trying not to think about it and John chimed in saying, it’s possible you’ll be feeling better by then. His optimism is sweet. But I’m not buying it. Recently, I’ve felt like I’ve been teetering between feeling the same and feeling worse. There hasn’t been much improvement, despite the yoga, and stretching and meditation and chiropractics and physical therapy… I’d keep going but I’ve exhausted myself doing so.
I’m not saying I’m not excited to get married in Jamaica. It has completely taken away any stress of planning the wedding. Apparently you arrive in Jamaica and meet with your wedding specialist for about 10 minutes where you point to some pictures of flowers and a cake and that’s about it. Sounds heavenly. I also found an RSVP site online where the guests can go to RSVP and it will keep track for me.
Sigh of Relief.
Here’s to hoping that I don’t wake up on my wedding day with a muscle spasm. Cause I’m walking down that aisle either way.
Yours in health (and hope)